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Christmas party 2014

2 Jan

Ever since I can remember “the girls” and I have had an annual Xmas party. I think it started when we were in grade 8 – so about 20+ years now! OMG, i sound old, but Im really not…Anyways, it has evolved over time – we’ve done fancy dress up, scavenger hunt, appetizers, sit down suppers, going out for supper, present exchange, no presents, new people, old people, some never to return people who just didn’t fit in – and now this year another it evolved to a “family” Christmas. This is something we’ve talked about doing for a few years but our “girl” time is so precious that we didn’t want to share that with anyone. Not even our kids.
As you are all aware by now,  everything has changed this year and it finally felt right. My “girl time” and “girls” are so very important to me. I value them all for a variety of different reasons. But one thing I admire them all for the most is the women that they’ve grown into and the mothers they’ve become.
We discuss our children all the time, the good and the not so good. But it’s entirely different watching them be parents rather than just listening. And it’s wonderful to physically see all the kids and not just hear about them.

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So this year we did it. We rented a room and had pizza and appetizers for supper. We planned some games, had a treat bag delivered and then the kids had a dance party for awhile before they all tired out and went off to bed. And then we still had our “girl” time.

This was a pivotal night for all of us. The first Christmas party without the biggest party girl. I know I was nervous. I wasn’t sure we still had it in us to be fun. To let all the pain and hurt from the past year go for the night and just be the silly girls we’ve always been.
We talked like old times, we danced, of course we cried, but we also laughed. Laughed like i hadn’t done in months.

And it felt good.
Soo good.
And sad.
But soo good.

I honestly had one of the best nights I have had in the almost 9 months since she passed.  Everything about that night felt like it was supposed to feel at christmas. And because it was amongst all the girls, it didn’t feel like betrayal. Her songs played on the stereo and we knew she was there celebrating with us. We laughed at things she would have done. We laughed like she would want us to laugh.

This is my extended family. I look forward to watching all these kids grow up to be functioning adults and watching all my girls grow as people too. It’s so true that its the moments in life that matter. These new memories along with all the christmas party past memories are really what its all about for me at christmas. I can’t wait to start planning next years party and look forward to those who weren’t able to join us this year to be there next year. Cuz after all, missing any girls night seems like a good idea at the time…but never actually is!

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